Alabama and Florida are the teams to beat in the SEC this year. Alabama because they return a Heisman trophy winning RB, their starting QB and WR, and many key players from their staunch defense from last year. Florida because the media is pavolvian in their response to Urban Meyer's pointing and staring. Arkansas will give be the only team in the West that can give 'Bama a run for their money, because by God, someone has to finally be able to win the SEC looking like a Big 12 team. Georgia is predicted to finish MARK RICHT IS ON THE HOT SEAT!!11!1 And we are whiny bastards. South Carolina is really, really poised to break out this year. Really.
Agents are pimps, players are whores, Nick Saban isn't invited to the next get together at Jimmy Sexton's personal country in the Caribbean. Finebaum is so infuriated that AJ Green was named first team SEC above Julio Jones, he declared that Julio has never been to Miami at least twice as well as AJ. Weslye Saunders looks to be the best tight end in the conference with a bunch of explaining to do. Houston Nutt might actually bite the head off a chicken during a game (the AT&T Chicken, probably). Derek Dooley speaks heresy at levels that would get most people excommunicated when he said he will get his Daddy in orange. Miss Barbara laughs at Urban Meyer's lack of intensity.
|Caldwell opens for Bill Engvall in Hoover (Photo:AP)|
Les Miles has no idea about the QB situation, not that anyone really could tell from his statements, since his statements seem to be nothing more than a rapid expungement of words that pop into his head; sort of a verbal, self-perpetuating Rorschach test. His hair looks like it was straight out of the Earnest Ainsley color and faith in a bottle collection. Steve Spurrier knows all about his QB situation and likes Garcia as his QB. Or not.
Finally, football season is here. In six weeks from this moment, some of us will already be drunk and everyone will be ready to see balls in the air.