Friday, May 7, 2010

Ah, the Weekend-Livin' in the Midwest Edition

As a Southerner living in the Midwest, it is often noticed that I do things differently than the folks up here.  A perfect example is my propensity for keeping my grill handy all winter, even when I have to shovel snow to get to it.  Now, for those of you that have never lived in a place where a May frost doesn't raise eyebrows and summer strictly and officially ends (not in a don't wear white way, but in a you shouldn't leave pets out way) at Labor Day, this does cause me some consternation.

I looked back at the winter weather and realized that we had one of the coldest winters on record, yet I either smoked or grilled nearly every weekend I wasn't traveling.  I would have done so more in the week, but when it gets dark at 4pm, you just kind of give up on that.  I also realized that many of my neighbors have just now gotten their grills out of winter lock down.  It could be my own obdurateness, but I just value the time outside too much, even when it is in the single digits, to simply scede over four or five months of the year to the weather.

Could you imagine just not going outside at all from June until September, because the temperature is over 90?

Yeah, me neither.  Yet, they still live here and act like it is all that.  I just refuse to think, despite the cold, that inside is the only place to be for that long.

Another thing I do is refuse to call cooking meat outside 'bar-b-queing.'  BBQ is a noun, one that describes pork (preferably chopped), or beef if you are from Texas.  BBQ isn't a noun describing an event.  Ribs aren't BBQ, although they fall into the BBQ food group.  Stop me if you've heard this rant.  You can smoke, grill, cook, heat, warm, or char. 

Oh, and they want to abolish Spring football.  Don't see the need. FGTBFKM.

Sorry for the rant, I just needed to get it out and move on.  Apparently, I miss Georgia a bit right now.


  1. Yeah, anybody who wants to call grilling burgers 'bar-b-queing' isn't really someone I'd prefer to hang with. I'm with you on the pork. I smoke with a dry rub of my own making and prefer a tomato based sauce applied after the meat comes off the grill. I do, however, consider my ribs BBQ.

  2. obdurateness...?? Couldn't you just say the Georgia boy in me? You really had your exile meter running pretty high there.

    But completely redeemed yourself with the BBQ rant. There's grilling...and there's BBQing. Grilling can sometimes be done in less than two beers. BBQing takes more self-marinading.

    Basic life skills, jeesh. Truly, I don't know how you survive up there among the heathens. Bless their hearts.

  3. Trying out my new book, Bernie: "Four Dollar Words Even Yankees Won't Use".