Monday, August 24, 2009

If You Want a Friend, Get a Dawg

Well, one of the signs of the apocalypse has come about. I got interviewed by a reporter in Oklahoma City for an article about the upcoming game in Stillwater. Someone sent my name to the reporter, who called me. His questions were smart and well thought out. I only wish I came across that way.

I don't want to give away the article (especially since I have no idea what he is going to write about), but he did give me the permission to reproduce the questions and my answers here*:

Reporter: I'm writing an article on the Sept. 5th matchup between Oklahoma State and Georiga and wanted to talk to a Georgia fan planning on going to the ballgame. Can you tell me why you are planning on.......
BIE: Go Dawgs!

Reporter: What?
BIE: Sorry, I get excited talking to the media.

Reporter: Ooooookay. So are you flying into Tulsa or Oklahoma City?
BIE: I am driving. It is only about eight hours from where I live now. Plus, I cannot bring a tent, fried chicken, bourbon, a ham, a hoop of cheese, bourbon, gumbo, coleslaw and a diet Coke on the plane.

Reporter: Wow. How many people will you be tailgating with?
BIE: Oh, that is just my food. Although I am traveling with several people.

Reporter: We were treated well when the Cowboys played in Athens. What will the Georgia fan that travels to Stillwater be like?
BIE: Well, we are a passionate bunch. Respectful, but not at all pushovers. We are willing to engage in the typical back and forth you might expect, but we won't cuss your momma, dog or wife. Your girlfriend and football team are fair game, as is ours. Also, we aren't at all like LSU or Florida fans, so there will be no underage girlfriends around. We'll be happy to share our bourbon, but only the cheap stuff.

Reporter: So, we know Georgia travels well. How many fans do you think will make the trip to Stillwater?
BIE: It'll be down this year with the lower ranking and lower expectations, probably only about 45,000.

Reporter: Really?!? The stadium only holds about 60,000.
BIE: Oh. Well. Probably only about 40,000 then.

Reporter: You think? That would be quite a showing.
BIE: I am not sure all of those will actually go into the game.

Reporter: Thanks. That'll be all, I think.
BIE: Wait! I studied Dez Bryant, Zac Robinson, Kendall Hunter. I was ready to give you a breakdown on Mike Gundy coached teams.

Reporter: Well, they do look pretty good.
BIE: I was also ready to talk about Rennie Curran and Geno Atkins. What about Joe Cox to AJ Green and Michael Moore?

Reporter: Who?
BIE: Never mind. That is just what I wanted to hear.

*Perhaps my memory isn't the greatest.


  1. Brilliant. You reflected the philosophy and culture of the Dawgnation perfectly.


  2. An image in my mind: The Battle of Little Stillwater

    Reporter as Gen Custer
    BIE as Sittin Bull

  3. You summed it up pretty well. I hope that the dawgs are ready. I feel like they will be.

  4. Very nice. I'm jealous that you're going to the game. I'm also increasingly worried about the game - as it could kind of set the done of the season. It also looks like my second kid could be born on game day, which would HAVE to be a good omen.

  5. That would be awesome. Congrats and good luck you you and Dr. O'C.